Hurts, wounds and scares, a part of every life, yes. Every one born of woman has been hurt and wounded, whether rich or poor, white or colured, young or old. And none of the hurt and wounded are exempted from the consequent scars borne from the inflicted wounds. We all carry these scars both inside and outside and no one is exempted; but how we deal with them, however determines the outcome of our lives.
It is not amazing at all at the many badly wounded there are amongst us. Lately everyone seems to be hurting, and while some are open about their hurts others strive so hard to hide them from people around them, and even themselves. So many are almost damaged in one way or the other, not just because of so many wounds sustained from life’s battle, but because of the burden of dealing with them alone.
I for one have had my fair share of hurts, wounds and scares. Some inflicted by business associates, some by friends and family alike. However I have come to understand that as long as one is dealing daily with human beings one is wont to be hurt. I have also come to realize that how I deal with each hurt determines the level and depth of the wound I sustain and ultimately how pretty or ugly the scars will be.
Over time I have also come to know that the hurts and the wounds are not as bad as the scars they leave. It is the scars that mar our form. How you may ask? let me break it down the way I understand it. When people hurt you, you feel really bad especially if the people are close to you. You nurse those hurts for weeks, months and even years. The intensity of the hurt each time you remember them, makes it feel like they just happened.
These hurts are like sharp daggers digging into the wounds you still nurse even after weeks, months and sometimes years have passed. They never seem to heal, for when it appears they have healed, any related incident just opens them up again making them hurt like fresh wounds. The frequency and intensity with which these wounds are reopened, simply means they have not completely healed.
It seems like they were only bandaged, or better still healed on the outside but sour and fresh within. The cause of the hurts and wounds was never processed, dealt with and transited from. They were just pushed back at the inner recess of the mind, where like worms they are allowed to fester and multiply, eating away at the core and fiber of one’s being.
My last relationship did not end so well. There was no closure and I simply moved on or so I thought. The sudden and abrupt end was like going cold turkey and so my emotions were jouncing. I had actually wanted to end the relationship for long but because of the ties established for long I kept pushing back the D day. This friend also knew I wanted him gone but was waiting for it to be on my terms.
So when it finally ended, my heart craved closure while my head said no. I finally agreed with my head knowing that pushing for closure meant leaving the door to that relationship open. If the door stayed open, that also means that I will keep going back and forth and never moving on to the next stage of my life.
Making the decision was a cool thing to do but on the contrary everything and everyday seemed to draw me back to what I thought I had left behind. I felt trapped. I did not make an exit plan and consequently did not prepare myself for the downers of a breakup. So try as much as I could to move on, I found out that I was still stuck at the same place I was before the sudden end of the relationship. I felt really confused and hurt but knew it was time to move on. All the errors that led to the breakup kept popping up in my head and mind. It was like a record being played on encore. I could not simply shake off the last incidents that led to the final break-up.
Then came tumbling in all other mishaps of all relationships gone sour and bad in my life. My mind became a playground for the devilish encore playing back and forth. Hurting memories were besieging me from on all sides. Trust the devil he knows how to turn a man into a curd chewing animal like a goat and the likes. And so like the curd chewing mammals, I chewed, stored away and regurgitated back to re-chew.
All the pains that came from each hurt was like a fresh wound, and with each re-chew or mastication the wounds kept going deeper and hurting as hell. Apart from my daughter whom I did not want to overburden with my pains, I nursed the hurts inflicted on me by friends, family, business associates and others alone.
Try as I could to stop these terrible memories from taking over my mind, I just could not. I knew then it was time to cry out to God for help. It was at this time that the Holy Spirit the great comforter began to lead me through a healing process. He led me on a journey of self-recovery. He needed me to first know that God loves me dearly and that I am who He says I am and not what the circumstances around my life engineered by the evil one and his consultants say I am.
He needed me to get my groove back on, so He worked with me to restore my self-esteem and confidence. He brought to my remembrance and expounded so many scriptures I used to merely quote without knowing the power of God encapsulated in them.
Scriptures like:
“Just as [in His love] He chose us in Christ [actually selected us for Himself as His own] before the foundation of the world, so that we would be holy [that is, consecrated, set apart for Him, purpose-driven] and blameless in His sight. In loveHe predestined and lovingly planned for us to be adopted to Himself as [His own] children through Jesus Christ, in accordance with the kind intention and good pleasure of His willto the praise of His glorious grace and favor, which He so freely bestowed on us in the Beloved [His Son, Jesus Christ].” Ephesians 1:4-6 AMP
Whaoo, this blew my mind. Can anything and anyone beat this incredible love with which the almighty God has loved us. No wander the devil is so jealous and tries to hurt us the object of God’s love.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful; I know that full well. Psalm 139:14 NIV
“But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light”. 1 Peter 2:9 NIV
“Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us. Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?” Romans 8:32-35 NLT
Researching this topic brought me to this web site and it spoke volumes to me. I recommend you also go through this beautiful piece from Bible Reading on Self-worth and self-esteem. To do that follow this link. https://biblereasons.com/self-worth-and-self-esteem/
And Dr Michelle Bengeston on Who God say you are. To do that, kindly follow this link. https://drmichellebengtson.com/who-god-says-you-are-17-scriptures-our-true-identity/
One thing was certain. Try as much as I did not to share my pain and sorrow with people, it was obvious to few people around me that I was going through a great deal of traumatic situations. How they knew beats me. But people sure knew. The way you get treated tells you in one way or the other that you are a pariah of sort. It appeared to me as I went through these challenges that the people I expected to understand my hurts, wounds and scars did not.
That made me to further distance myself from them as most of them, I assume, do not want to share the hurts of others. They all I presume have their own issues and do not want to over burden themselves with other people’s issues. Alone I was then in my hurt working things out gently one day at a time with Holy Spirit helping me and my daughter supporting from her end.
So when in my dream lately I saw my body full of scares from wounds I had sustained I knew that those scares would have been visible to people that I did not share my pains with. So many of us carry these scares around, exhibiting them in more ways than one without even knowing. Trust me, people know when you are dealing with stuff, because these unhealed wounds and scares gives you away, one or the other.
This dream with wounds all over my body got me thinking so much about the scars we all carry through life and their damaging effects on us and others we relate with. What is comforting though is the fact that no one has to deal with these hurts and wounds alone. With adequate knowledge, counsel and support, we all can manage as well prevent these hurts, wounds and scars form permanently limiting or damaging our lives and those of others in our sphere of influence.
The word of God has been of tremendous help to me. They not only comfort and soothe me, but they also dispel all fears that the devil feeds my mind to deter me from accomplishing God’s purpose for my life. Awesome Scriptures like these are powerful tools with which to scatter all the fiery darts that the enemy fires at our minds to keep us down, sad and hurting. We can all choose to be joy-full always, loving every moment of our lives, mixed with painful and happy moments alike. Like a friend always says,
Happiness is a choice we make, despite what we are going through.
I love these comforting scriptures, they were and still is of incredible strength to me: –
“And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows”. Luke 12:7 NLT
“…Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine”.
For more scriptures please continue to the end of the post.
Isaiah 43:1 NIV
“Others were given in exchange for you. I traded their lives for yours because you are precious to me. You are honored, and I love you.
Isaiah 43:4 NIV
“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus”.
Philippians 3:13-14 NIV
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43:18-19
“To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified”.
Isaiah 61:3 KJV
“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand”. Isaiah 41:10 NLT
Glorify the LORD with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame. This poor man called, and the LORD heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them. Psalm 34:3-7 NIV
For a comprehensive read on this topic, you can click on the link below to be abreast with the first post. https://fountainofresources.com/hurts-wounds-and-scars-part-1/
There is hope for all alive. Keep Faith and trust God. It sure will end well.
Thank you for reading to the end. Kindly leave a comment and share.
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